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The Juggle Struggle

A Mama of One Became a Mama of Two…

Month: January 2018

Just the Reminder I Needed (A Story of Comparison)

Like many women, I have always found things to compare myself to. I have compared my body when mine is not the way I want, even though my body does amazing things; I have compared my marriage when we hit bumps in the road, even though our love is strong; I have compared my job… Read More Just the Reminder I Needed (A Story of Comparison)

January 26, 2018January 25, 2018 The Juggle StruggleLeave a comment

Shedding a Layer: A Period of Transition

This post is a long time in the making, but it’s not something I could really discuss until now – until after the new year, until my transition into full time stay at home mom was complete.  And now that this time is here, I can say the period leading up to this moment has… Read More Shedding a Layer: A Period of Transition

January 12, 2018 The Juggle StruggleLeave a comment

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But at least now I can help from the comfort of the sofa... . . . #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #momlife #growingup #growinguptoofast #toddlerlife #raisingbabies #itwaseasierwhen #butitsworthitnow #silverlining #motherhood #parenthood #love #life #family #happiness #momtruth #doorknobs #safetyfirst #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodmoments #momblog #momblogger
I have heard many times that toddlers do not know how to manipulate. Ahem, excuse me?! I thoroughly beg to differ. In fact, I think manipulation is a toddler's Olympic sport, Bread and Butter, God given gift. I could sit here and rattle off an endless list of moments I've been caught up in the throngs of toddler trickery, but right now the one that matters most is the bedtime game. Holy Moly! Who feels me here?! This Struggle is so real, we half laugh and Hal cry our way through it every single night. But it's not the bathtime, jammie time, reading time or actual saying goodnight part that's so hard. All that is relatively easy, enjoyable, and usually provide at least 10 minutes of cozy cuddles that are otherwise hard to come by with this crazy pint-sized ball of energy. It's the 1-2 hours (!?!?!?!?) following the "goodnight" that makes this our most dreaded time of day. It has become 1-2 hours of whining for "mommy" or "daddy" until one of us answers his calls, followed by at least one request, from a sip of water, to going potty, to adding to his bedtime car collection. And this smart cookie *thinks* that when daddy doesn't give the answer he wants to hear, he can just call on mommy. (We're onto you, kid). But, I'm pretty sure he's also onto us... last night I was sitting in the living room listening to him call my name for the millionth time. When I really just wanted to yell "SHUT THE EFFFFFFF UP!" I calmly went in for one last time (because he is my child and I love him despite the whines). But even with my "this is the last time" demeanor, as soon as I stood beside his bed, he said he just wanted to kiss my cheek 😍. And then my other cheek 😍. And then my hair 😍. And then my nose 😍. He proceeded to give the most gentle kiss to every part of my face. And gentle is generally not a part of his vocabulary. He melted my heart, I tucked him in one last time, and he rested his sweet little head on his mattress right beside his beloved trains and trucks. I whispered "goodnight" and quietly left the room so happy in my heart that I decided to answer his relentless call one last time... five minutes go by: "daaaaddddddyyyyy!" (JUST GO THE F*CK TO SLEEP!)
There should be something called "baby laughter therapy" because I'm pretty sure that little voice can solve anything... This song was written by the amazing and ingenious Sandra Boynton (a childhood fave of mine, and now a fave of my kiddies). It is on her super awesome CD/Book combo "Frog Trouble," which features great artists singing cute, fun and family friendly tunes. It was gifted to us by some dear friends, and is now a staple on every car ride. (Any album with "a song about trucks" is sure to win my son over). Do yourself a favor and check it out!! . . Song: Beautiful Baby Artist: Darius Rucker Album: Frog Trouble 🐸 The Juggle Struggle: The Sound of Motherhood (a Spotify playlist) . . . #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #motherhood #parenthood #parenting #momlife #happiness #love #life #family #happykids #babylaughter #momlife #motherhoodunplugged #momof2 #raisingbabies #songs #music #thesoundofmotherhood #mamatunes #musictherapy #lyrics #beautifulbaby #frogtrouble #sandraboynton #dariusrucker #kidsongs #thelettergrams #feltlikesharing #letterfolk @sandra_boynton @dariusrucker
But at least my vocal cords are always warmed up and ready for my solo... . . . #thejugglestruggle #thestruggleisreal #thejuggleisreal #motherhood #parenthood #momlife #parenting #parentingmoments #love #life #happiness #toddlermom #toddlerlife #raisingbabies #momlife #momof2 #alwaysonrepeat #selectivehearing #itwaseasierwhen #butitsworthitnow #silverlining #mamatruth #motherhoodunplugged #mothers #mothersunite
Mamas, last week was H-A-R-D. And not because I have 2 kids, but because I have a 2-1/2 year old ball of energy and emotion, with a fire in his belly, and a devil in his eye. I thought we entered the “terrible twos” a long time ago, but it seems anytime I get comfortable with his antics, he changes them up on me (duh)… but this time it reached 11. These tantrums and meltdowns are so REAL, they have made me question if they are normal (whatever that means at this sensitive age). But watching him go through these fits of frustration, anger and distress has made me realize THIS is our new “thick of it,” and as he nears the even more sensitive age of 3, it might be just the beginning (God help me). It’s funny - now that he’s past the 2 year mark and has met all his expected milestones from those first years - crawling, sitting, standing, walking, talking - we thought we were “in the clear” with watching and analyzing his every move. But oh no… some things may have gotten easier, but now we’re in behavior-land - a land where things are not so textbook clear. A land where every kid really does look very different, and a land where everyones parenting looks just as different, and THAT is what makes this feel so difficult. Because when you have the kid who just tackled another because his toy was taken, and is kicking and screaming as you strap him in the stroller on your way out of the park, and everyone else seems to be playing so nicely together, it’s hard to remember that all those kids and mamas have probably been there too - and if not yet, they will be soon. Some days are far easier than others, and each week feels like a fresh start. But this is truly the grit-your-teeth-and-bear-it phase, when only LOVE can get us through and we’ll pray to come out unscathed on the other side. Yet this kid is silly amazing - and every day he does something that makes me laugh. And even when he does 10 things that make me want cry, and seems to have a tantrum an hour, and I just want to close the door on the day, that one laugh is EVERYTHING. Thank God those laughs last longer than those cries. . #TheJuggleStruggle #Motherhood #Parenthood #OneDayAtATime
Happiness Is... What puts a smile on your face?! Song: Happy People Artist: Little Big Town The Juggle Struggle: The Sound of Motherhood (a Spotify playlist) . . . #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #motherhood #parenthood #momlife #raisingbabies #happypeople #honesty #thelifeofamother #alldayeveryday #momof2 #motherhoodunplugged #motherof2 #motherhoodtogether #songs #lyrics #littlebigtown #thesoundofmotherhood #mamatunes #musictherapy #spotify #spotifyplaylist #adayinthelife #thelettergrams #feltlikesharing #letterboardquotes #motherhoodunderstood #life #family @littlebigtown
But at least I have a personal valet to fetch my slippers and robe with GREAT enthusiasm... . . . #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #motherhood #parenthood #momlife #toddlermom #raisingbabies #earlymornings #happymonday #mondayblues #sahmlife #momof2 #itwaseasierwhen #butitsworthitnow #sleepingin #justkidding #love #life #happiness #family #alwaystired #sleepdeprived #thisismotherhood #momblog #momblogger
MOM BOD PT. II // A few days ago I learned that I am officially back to my pre-second-pregnancy weight. I say this not to brag or boast, but I say this to acknowledge that it’s ok be to celebrate it.  There is a beautiful movement in the motherhood community to embrace our postpartum bodies for what they are, and everything they have given us.  I firmly believe this is right, and I, too, treat my body the way it is as an amazing tool that has grown and birthed and fed 2 humans.  Truly, nothing short of a miracle, and every extra pound and ripple it carries has been meaningfully earned, and is very much respected.  I wrote about my mental struggle with my postpartum body after my first, and my acceptance of it’s being after the birth of my second (link in profile), and I have continued to love and hate it every step of the way.  My body is still nothing of what it used to be - I still have a little tummy thanks to a slow-to-heal diastasis recti, and I have stretch marks and stretched skin that may never “bounce back”. I have toning and exercising to (somehow/someday) make more time for, and I most definitely have a new threshold of “feeling good” in my skin.  But that doesn’t take away from the fact that a silly number on the scale can symbolize so much to a postpartum mama.  For me, it feels like I’m getting myself back - even just a little bit.  I look different, I feel different.  The distribution of that number is a far cry from what it was a year ago, and that number is still 10 pounds higher from what it was 3 year ago.  But that’s not the point.  To all the mamas out there struggling to “get back” - you ARE beautiful the way you are, and your body IS amazing.  But there is nothing wrong with wanting to see or feel your body the way it used to be… it’s about your identity, it’s about self love, it’s about acceptance.  Just as I’m not ashamed of my mom-bod, I’m not ashamed of my little “return to self” happiness either. So I'm just gonna sit with it for a moment, and then continue to be thankful for everything my body is, has been, and continues to be. . . . #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #motherhood #parenthood #postpartum
Motherhood: the bravest job of all. Well... not really - but some days it sure does feel like it. Song: Extraordinary Machine Artist: Fiona Apple The Juggle Struggle: The Sound of Motherhood (a Spotify playlist) . . . #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #motherhood #parenthood #identity #momlife #raisingbabies #extraordinarymachine #honesty #thelifeofamother #alldayeveryday #momof2 #motherhoodunplugged #motherof2 #motherhoodtogether #songs #lyrics #fionaapple #thesoundofmotherhood #mamatunes #musictherapy #spotify #spotifyplaylist #adayinthelife #thelettergrams #feltlikesharing #letterboardquotes #motherhoodunderstood #life
But now I have the best excuses for homemade cookies... . . . #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #momlife #dessert #toddlerlife #raisingbabies #itwaseasierwhen #butitsworthitnow #motherhood #parenthood #love #life #family #happiness #dessert #slipperyslope #truth #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodmoments #momblog #momblogger
MAKING MEMORIES // My husband has this saying "if you build it, he will come"... er, wait, I must be confusing my life with a Kevin Costner movie (don't worry, Field of Dreams is never lost on me)... but he does believe, with his whole blessed heart, that if you have something, you will use it, and it will be magical. For instance, he really, really, really wants a kayak. I'm pretty sure he could count on one hand the number of times in his life he's been kayaking. But he's quite SURE that if he has it, he will use it. My number one question is, where are we gonna store it? Because, while he lives in a world where having it means he'll use it, I live in reality - with a fondu set that hasn't seen the light of day since our first month of marriage. So when he convinced me to get a season pass to Knott's Berry Farm, I was a little skeptical, to say the least. After all, I could count on one hand the number of times I had been there in my life - and what in the world is a toddler gonna get out of it?! Well I'll tell you what - he wins this one. In the few short months we have had a season pass, it has become a fast favorite of my son's, and thus mine and my husbands, as well. Yes, we have zoo and museum memberships, and those are undoubtedly some of the best monies we've spent. But there is something so beautifully nostalgic about an amusement park that is made so much sweeter by making new memories with our littles. This was not a place I would think to go more than once or twice a year, but with the ease that a season pass provides, it is now nearly an every weekend activity (and has become somewhat of a staple destination for my husband and son's special days together). This is not an ad for Knott's Berry Farm - though it may sound as such. Rather, I now believe the memberships are what make us go more than once a year, and in doing so, we are creating lasting memories and wonderful family experiences. How could you argue otherwise? I'm still not sure about that kayak though... #thejugglestruggle #thestruggleisreal #thejuggleisreal @knottsberryfarm
This perfect, classic song has another pretty choice lyric: "from the moment I could talk / I was ordered to listen." I feel ya, kid. Life doesn't make any sense sometimes. Yes, motherhood is frikkin hard. But being a toddler must come in at a close second. Song: Father and Son Artist: Cat Stevens The Juggle Struggle (The Sound of Motherhood) . . . #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #motherhood #parenthood #toddlerlife #toddlerhood #momlife #toddlermom #momof2 #lifelessons #happiness #love #family #motherhoodmoments #momtruth #music #lyrics #catstevens #yusufislam #fatherandson #songlyrics #mamatunes #thesoundofmotherhood #spotify #spotifyplaylist #letterboard #letterboardquotes #letterfolk
But at least I don't have to change any more diapers! (We're not quite there yet... but a mama can dream) . . . #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #momlife #pottytraining #toddlerlife #raisingbabies #itwaseasierwhen #butitsworthitnow #motherhood #parenthood #love #life #family #happiness #momof2 #momtruth #honesty #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodmoments #momblog #momblogger
THE WITCHING HOUR // So what does yours look like?! I take comfort in thinking it’s the same in most households, but OMG do I dread the dinner hour!  I assumed that once I was home and not coming home from the office AT dinner time, things would ease up, and time would be in my favor.  But how is it that 6pm sneaks up like a crouching tiger EVERY. SINGLE. DAY?! And even when I start the dinner process at 4pm, without fail I encounter at least one of the following: 1.toddler begging me to play “walk, car, go”  2.baby hungry and ready to nurse, only when the oven or stove should be on 3.toddler raiding the kitchen for any and all snacks he can find (and subsequently squashing his dinner appetite) 4.baby wanting to be held AT ALL TIMES 5.dinner “prep” (always) taking twice as long as any recipe says it should (lying bastards) And I almost always encounter at least five minutes of both kids yelling, crying, screaming at the same time. So I bounce back and fourth to feed one in the highchair and ogle the other’s train track creations, all while finding a moment to chop some veggies and preheat the oven.  I’ve learned that doing anything  in the house (including dinner prep) requires built in “breaks” to attend to the kids’ wants and needs throughout, making everything take extra time.  But this is also the time that the TV comes on, I pour a glass of wine, and just brace until bedtime.  And the one thing I dread MORE than this dinner time witching hour? It’s the post-dinner clean up… One day, in my dream of dreams, I will become a meal-prepping, time managing genius.  But until I figure out how to be that type of person, I’ll pat myself on the back each time I get creative in the kitchen and make easy-peasy (and fancy looking) pizzas on the fly… because these are the moments my mom skills never fail to surprise me. #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #motherhood #parenthood #foodie #stayathomemom #thewitchinghour #parenting #momskills #dinnertime #pizza #theafternoonrush #momstrong #happiness #family #love #life #realmoments #momlife #mealprep #familydinner #momgoals #raisingbabies #toddlerlife #sahm #sahmlife
When you're so far in you don't remember life before them. That's the Juggle Struggle. The identity of Motherhood. The endless, boundless, blinding love we have for our babies. Song: Landslide Artist: Fleetwood Mac The Juggle Struggle: The Sound of Motherhood (a Spotify playlist) . . . #thejugglestruggle #thestruggleisreal #thejuggleisreal #motherhood #parenthood #marriage #love #life #happiness #loveiseverything #change #identity #momlife #raisingbabies #motherhoodtogether #music #lyrics #fleetwoodmac #landslide #musictherapy #spotify #spotifyplaylist #momblog #momblogger #mamatunes #thesoundofmotherhood #spotify #spotifyplaylist #letterfolk #letterboardquotes
But at least I get my daily cardio... . . . #thejugglestruggle #thejuggleisreal #thestruggleisreal #momlife #mamaworkout #toddlerlife #raisingbabies #itwaseasierwhen #butitsworthitnow #motherhood #parenthood #love #life #family #happiness #fitmom #realmoments #motherhoodunplugged #motherhoodmoments #momblog #momblogger
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